Help me out here, vegans.
Devo: Look, I'm glad you're here, because I have another Super Important Vegan Question (SIVQ™) for you
Vegan Ex-Girlfriend (VEG): oh yeah?
Devo: if a vegan was walking through a forest, and like... a deer was walking along and died right in front of them, of natural causes (like maybe a tree branch fell on its head??) would the vegan object to eating that deer? And if so, what would be the basis of their objection?
VEG: I can't answer for vegans in general, but i can answer for me, personally
VEG: NO
VEG: THAT IS GROSS
Devo: well I'm not saying you just start munching away at it..
VEG: still disgusting.
Devo: But from what perspective?
Devo: Have you had venison stew? Because it is PRETTY good.
VEG: DISGUSTING
VEG: i personally simply hate eating meat
Devo: Ok ok fine, let me change the question a little bit
Devo: you come across an abandoned beehive.. it's abandoned because some really hungry birds came along and ate all the bees, but it's still full of honey
Devo: would you eat the honey?
VEG: maaaaaaaybe
VEG: but probably not, cos if birds had eaten the bees, i would assume there would be feathers all through the honey.
Devo: Ugh... the honey is inside the hive sooo... there are no feathers in it
Devo: JUST DELICIOUS HONEY
Devo: YOU CAN MAKE BAKLAVA WITH IT
VEG: well, then, how did the birds get all the bees? what about the queen?
Devo: look, the bees are gone
Devo: just sweet sweet fructose there for the scavengin'
VEG: is this like that "after humans" show?
VEG: "after bees"
Devo: yeah, the bee rapture occurred
VEG: the bee eschaton?
Devo: exactly, as was foretold in beevalations
Devo: there's no problem with eating the post-beepocalyptic honey, is there? Ethically speaking?
VEG: um.
VEG: look i gotta go.
Dec 13th